Awkward Encounter

(Warning: May not be suitable for young readers.)

With the weather as gorgeous as it was, I decided to do an easy 12 miles around WyCo yesterday afternoon. John recently had minor surgery, so I was on my own. No big deal since it was the middle of the day in broad daylight and I'm getting to know WyCo like it's my own backyard.

There had to have been hundreds of people at WyCo. There were parties at every single shelter I ran past. I saw three inflatable bouncy castles, three pull-behind BBQs, and at least 50 motorcycles. I felt like an interloper cutting through the festivities and trying to refill my water bottle.

At shelter 11, I needed to stop to refill. There was a retirement party here, several grills going and lots of people laughing and eating. As I stepped up to the water hydrant, I had an awkward encounter with a pleasant-looking black gentleman that went something like this:

Him: "I can get you a cold one."
Me: "That's OK, I can just refill here."
"No sweetie, let me get you an ice cold one. It's no problem."

I walked over to his cooler where he pulled out a cold bottle of water for me.

"What I really wanted to show you was my apron."

The front of his apron had an iron-on decal of a black Angus and hand-painted words that said Where's the Beef? I laughed a little and then he picked up the front flap of his apron.

Under the flap was an anatomically correct, giant black penis and balls. Giant. There even was a few pieces of black yarn to represent pubic hairs. I was slightly shocked.

I tried to laugh and not act too flustered. I made a comment about how nice a day it was for a cookout. To which he replied "Your headlights are looking nice, too."

At that point I was sufficiently uncomfortable enough to turn and run up the hill. The only comforting thought was that even after 6 miles, I knew I could out run this guy. I guess I should have listened to my mom when she told me never to talk to strangers.


Samantha said...

DOOOODDDD....what a creepy creeperton!!! Should have junk punched him!! Sorry about that Sam....its sorta funny, but more creepy than funny.
Be careful!!

Josh Snellink said...

Maybe you should take my pepper spray from me next thursday... sounds like you need it more than I do. People tend to leave the crazy guy with no shoes alone :D