Operation Jaybird (AKA Super Secret Naked Night Run)

The team has been assembled. The date has been set. The rendezvous site has been chosen. The official time will be sent via text message, after which it will self-destruct. Unfortunately for you, those details are released on a need-to-know basis and if you don't already know, you don't need to. If any unauthorized people show up at the start of the operation, the information-leaking offender will be duct-taped naked to a tree and left to fend for herself. This is serious, people.

There are risks involved, including (but not limited to): poison ivy, insect bites, abrasions, chaffing, bouncing, public indecency, and blinding (my tush hasn't seen sunlight in, well, I couldn't even tell you). Team members are responsible for where they aim their flashlights.

I personally have assembled some of the best naked runners around. The main qualification for finding good naked runners is: they want to run naked.

For those participating in Operation (Naked as a) Jaybird, be prepared. For those who aren't, pay attention. You just might catch a glimpse of several streaking ladies sometime in the near future.